Recent content by Def_Starr

  1. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    so now i need some meds mmmkaay to numb the brain
  2. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    when you lose almost everything, you give up on life sorta?
  3. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    Same, fck cnbc, and those democratic assholes fuckig up our country
  4. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    same, missed you also and the forum
  5. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    hey all, just working allot stupid gov shutdown last year, car accident lost 3 jobs in past 2 insurances..now working at another call center...fkin boring
  6. Def_Starr

    I AM BACK

    Its been a hard struggle , lost my job at 2 major corporations, but now i am with the best EMPLOYER......TRUMP Mentioned our company on .T.V,,,, i am working to get my sales license to sell HEALTH INSURANCE>>>> I AM A JUNIOR ASSOCIATE!!! I MISSED YOU ALL
  7. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    @scrtlvrby it took 7days to w/d at home, first 3days were the worst, i used Alcohol and COLD TURKEY ,and lots of showers, and massive sweating--- constantly changing sweat pants and hoodies. I hope your son makes it. I did this twice in the past 6 months, It worked but than 1 month later i...
  8. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    thank you
  9. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    It sucks cause I found a Job shortly after being terminated with a major cell phone company, but i bad bad bad accident , I BLACKED OUT DRIVING!!! I crashed into a Barricade, i was in a Coma for 2 days, car was Totaled/Wrecked back in August 2019.... I am  thankful no one else was injured or...
  10. Def_Starr

    ppe2u

    so PPE is officially done? its strange the same time TTM went down a month later PPE goes down,  new administration is not playing on shutting down websites /and such i dont mean ADMIN here i mean the new USA adminstration crackdown on oversea's order's... depending on country of origin 
  11. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    Started training and fired a week after, no real reason, no unemployment benefits yet , still pending, shits getting hard alcohol to help with Xanax tapper,  relapsed when I was in training and took more again, now I gotta get serious , I have a emergency fund where im paid upto until...
  12. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    status update I didn't end myself 😕 , the xnx w/ds were harsh the first 2-3days ,I did a hard cold turkey and was around family so I was in a perfect position, than I let all the shivering, cold/hotsweats, all the nasty w/d's you get from Xanax (I been on this for 10years, not one day skipped...
  13. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    @Akup7ich, my condolences to your family member loss. I know that feeling, I have a family member who is older and I though of that scenario how it can be burden and the what if scenario. Allot of banks/assist agencies/…. every representative says "you sound discourage" , no this is my MAN...
  14. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    how long can saliva test detect THC/BENZO's I got the script for benzos but I am flushing out the THC! its been 4days :P im lean no fat I hope the best for your husband as well @Akup7ich   I had some monetary breakdown downs, where I been hating on myself and calling myself garbage, I kinda...
  15. Def_Starr

    Terminated from work / federal shut down/Drug test employement

    i am waiting for un-employtement to kick in, I worked enough for close to 15-18years as well as your husband , yeah I been having break downs , the last few nights I been sleeping in a bath tub lol with 3 sweatpants on and 2 hoodies and a jacket, walking around the house CALLING MYSELF A POS...
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  1. Realbenzeyes @ Realbenzeyes: I always thought I should’ve been born in a much earlier time but I will say, i do enjoy my Xbox and occasional TV series tho 😂
  2. Realbenzeyes @ Realbenzeyes: I just wish the opioid epidemic never happened. Fk the turn of the century (which would be cool no doubt)! Many of my friends and family would’ve ended up in asylums like so many others. I just wish I could get back all those I’ve lost since the start
  3. L @ Layne_Cobain: 1914 I meant
  4. L @ Layne_Cobain: I often wish I lived during the turn of the century or at least before the Harrison narcotics act or whatever I think it was 1924 the fun ended but anyway yeh being able to get laudanum, ❄️ and amphetamine at the local friendly pharmacy
  5. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: Chew on the leaves with a bit of slaked lime and enjoy the mild boost you get from the raw base.
  6. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I’m sure you know the folks in the mountainous regions along South Americas pacific side buy cócà leaves at the local farmers market just to help acclimate to the higher elevation when they have to head up into the hills.
  7. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I would certainly have bought it, swilled it, enjoyed it…. Why not? A little boost in your juice isn’t going to hurt anyone.
  8. R @ Royboy99: Exports were reported to have around 7.2mg per FL OZ, it’s success is what actually led to Coca Cola
  9. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: Having cramps and husband thinks you’re acting hysterical (ie. PMS) the doc would either perform a certain massage to relieve the strains of motherhood and family life of that time or send you down to the local apothecary for a bottle of laudanum… A tincture of alcohol and 10% òpìųm. Fun days huh?
  10. R @ Royboy99: @malestrom: yeah thats it, my bad Mariani, yeah i considered that and also its ROA, which was oral so the bioavailability was lower than insufflation, higher degree of purity tho and longer duration … there was a significant marked increase of patents filed by Edison during the time it was released in the US. Presidents were known to use it as well, and the Queen. The pope awarded the wine the Vatican gold medal award
  11. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I think it was called vin Mariani. But yeah, it was all the rave back in the turn to the 20th century. Original formula Coca Cola did it for a while too. I think it was pretty weak though. Something like 200 mg per liter of wine. Enough to maybe give you a little push but unless you could pound some serious alcohol, it’d be hard to really feel the effects before the ethyl knocked you down on the ground. It was an interesting time period. Laudanum was a “hysterical” woman’s best friend.
  12. R @ Royboy99: Maybe it’s the admixture of my South American dna that works so well with it ? 🤷
  13. R @ Royboy99: It’s all evident in memory recall, my emails, meetings, … people invest everything they have in a nootropic that provides this… desperately searching without success and it’s right there right under their nose (no pun) … stigmatized by society and outlawed.
  14. R @ Royboy99: Now I’m not foolish or delusional to think that it made Edison who he was … it just allowed him to Edison to Edison to a greater degree … and I see it doing that for me and others who use it as a productive tool and not a substance of abuse.. you can look at this data with the level of patents filed by Edison during that time … comparable to Barry bonds or McGuire breaking records while they were subtly enhanced
  15. R @ Royboy99: One could argue that we would not have motion pictures if it wasn’t for ❄️
  16. R @ Royboy99: I also take month long breaks and replace with Ritalin for receptor recovery
  17. R @ Royboy99: And while it may sound insane and completely destructive … small microdoses of ❄️ has really transformed me. I did extensive research on its use by Edison, the pope at the time, and many others who got great benefit from a wine concoction called vin Mariani … this subtle enhancement changed the world and as long its used with a high degree of control, it’s amazing. you may think I’m crazy … but I’m just being as transparent as I can
  18. R @ Royboy99: I’ve grown to realize that my time is finite and Im only getting older… I’m back to relying on small PRN doses of FDA trialed BZDs and it’s made tremendous improvements to my quality of life. I just need to get out there more and meet someone new, it’s the only piece that’s missing since I’ve managed to get it together
  19. R @ Royboy99: @LatsDoodis: thanks brother … I’ve spent months trying to put myself in uncomfortable places to grow stronger. Hours of research, thousands on supplements, therapy etc …
  20. LatsDoodis @ LatsDoodis: @Royboy99 You’re not yet lost. Cut them losses and do what you don’t want to do. Take the boring, shameful, nerve racking way out. It’s the only road back to balance. When you’re ready, you’ll do it. Hit me up if you want support quitting. This ain’t worth your life!
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