B
Big Rob
Guest
The Lingam Massage
Background Information:
The Sanskrit word for the male sexual organ is Lingam (pronounced
LING-AHM, [LING rhymes with sing]) and is loosely translated as "Wand of
Light." Its meaning is different in intention from the typical Western
view of the penis (i.e., Cock, Prick, Dong, Dick, etc., words that may
come from a limited perspective, depending on the intent of their
usage). In Tantra/Sacred Sexuality, the Lingam is respectfully viewed
and honoured, a "Wand of Light" that channels creative energy and
pleasure.
The purpose of the Lingam Massage is to create a space the receiver to
relax, and receive expanded pleasure from his Lingam. His partner (the
giver) experiences the joy of facilitating and witnessing the man
surrendering to his softer, gentler side. The Lingam Massage can be used
as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used) and is an excellent
process to build trust and intimacy. It is often used to help men heal
from negative sexual conditioning and trauma.
Orgasm is not the goal of the Lingam massage although it is often a
pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is to massage the Lingam,
also including testicles, perineum and Sacred Spot (the equivalent to
the female G-spot), and allow the man to surrender to a form of pleasure
he may not be used to. From this perspective both receiver and giver
relax into the massage.
Men need to learn to RELAX and RECEIVE. Traditional sexual conditioning
has the man in a doing and goal oriented mode. The Lingam Massage allows
the man to experience his softer, more receptive side and experience
pleasure from a non-traditional perspective.
Preparation:
Take a relaxing bath or shower. Take your time and breathe deeply.
Conscious, relaxed breathing will take you out of your mental process
and will get you more into your feelings. Relax your belly and let go of
the tension that most of us hold there.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best results occur when the bowels and bladder are empty.
Let go of your thoughts and connect with your partner through hugging,
holding, eye gazing (looking into each other's eyes for an extended
time), bringing both of you to a place of relaxation and trust.
Procedure:
Have the receiver lie on his back with pillows under his head so he can
look up at his partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel,
under his hips. His legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly
bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and his
genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers' legs.
Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Gently
massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, chest, nipples, etc., to get the
receiver to relax. Remind the receiver to breathe deeply and to sink
deeper into relaxation.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil (or water-based lubricant
when using latex gloves) on the shaft of the Lingam and testicles. Begin
gently massaging the testicles, taking care to not cause pain in this
sensitive area. Massage the scrotum gently, causing it to relax. Massage
the area above the Lingam, on the pubic bone. Massage the Perineum, the
area between the testicles and anus. Take your time. You are giving a
massage to an often neglected area of the body.
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Massage the shaft of the Lingam. Vary the speed and pressure. Gently
squeeze the Lingam at the base with your right hand, pull UP and slide
off and then alternate with your left hand. Take your time doing this,
right, left, right, left, etc. Then, change the direction by starting
the squeeze at the head of the Lingam/ penis and then sliding DOWN and
off. Again, alternate with right and left hands.
Massage the head of the Lingam as if you are using an orange juicer.
Massage all around the head and shaft. In Tantra there are many nerve
endings on the Lingam that correspond to other parts of the body. It is
said many ailments can be cured by receiving a good Lingam Massage.
NOTE: The Lingam may or may not go soft as you perform this technique.
Do not worry if it doesn't get hard again. You will probably find that
it will get hard, then go soft, get hard again, etc., which is a highly
desirable Tantric experience, like riding a wave, bobbing up and down.
Hardness and Softness are two ends of the pleasure spectrum.
If it appears that the receiver is going to ejaculate, back off,
allowing the Lingam to soften a little before resuming the massage. Do
this several times, coming close to ejaculation, and then backing off.
Remember, the goal is not orgasm in and of itself. Men can learn the art
of ejaculatory mastery and control by coming close to ejaculation and
then backing off on the stimulation. Deep breathing is key here and will
soften the urge to ejaculate. Eventually ejaculatory mastery will allow
you to make love as long as you want and you can become multi-orgasmic
without losing a drop of semen. Orgasm and ejaculation are two different
responses that you can learn to separate. The result is a very expanded
sex life.
Find and massage the male Sacred Spot. There are two ways to do this.
One is by finding the spot midway between the testicles and anus. There
is a small indentation about the size of a pea or maybe larger. Be
gentle and push inward. He will feel the pressure deep inside and it may
be intensely painful at first. Eventually, as this area is worked on
and softened, he will be able to expand his orgasms and master
ejaculatory control. You can massage his Lingam with your right hand and
massage his Sacred Spot with your left hand. Try pushing in on this
spot when he nears ejaculation. It is aptly named the Million Dollar
Point in Taoism.
The other way to access the Sacred Spot is through the anus. Many men,
especially heterosexual men, are uncomfortable at first as a result of
negative sexual conditioning. Be careful here and use lubrication. The
key is to go slow and be very gentle. Make sure he is breathing as you
slip a finger from your left hand into the anus about an inch or so.
Then crook the finger back in a "come here" gesture. You will feel the
prostate gland. Vary the pressure and speed of massage. He may want
stimulation of the Lingam as you massage the Sacred Spot. Back off on
the Lingam as he approaches orgasm and increase the pressure on the
Sacred Spot.
Sometimes the man may have strong emotions come up during access to the
Sacred Spot. He may cry and remember a traumatic event from his past.
You, the giver, are in a place of trust and intimacy. Allow him to feel
his emotions and be very loving, not trying to console or fix him, just
let him feel whatever he needs to. Encourage him to scream, cry, moan,
sob, if it feels appropriate. Be the best friend and healer he could
have in that moment.
Ending the Massage:
If he chooses to let go and ejaculate, encourage him to breathe deeply
during the orgasm. It will blow his mind, especially if he has come
close and held back at least SIX times before ejaculating. Holding back
six times charges up the sexual battery with tremendous energy. It is
then his choice as to where he wants to send this energy -- out with
their ejaculate (the prevailing paradigm) or inward for other uses (men
who master ejaculation are able to channel this energy into other areas
of their being).
When he feels complete with the massage gently remove your hands and
allow him to lie there quietly. You may want to snuggle up together or
you can leave the room and let him drift off into a meditative state.
Allow him to fully experience his childlike innocence and magnificent
male beauty.
Have fun with this technique and share it with your friends and loved ones
Background Information:
The Sanskrit word for the male sexual organ is Lingam (pronounced
LING-AHM, [LING rhymes with sing]) and is loosely translated as "Wand of
Light." Its meaning is different in intention from the typical Western
view of the penis (i.e., Cock, Prick, Dong, Dick, etc., words that may
come from a limited perspective, depending on the intent of their
usage). In Tantra/Sacred Sexuality, the Lingam is respectfully viewed
and honoured, a "Wand of Light" that channels creative energy and
pleasure.
The purpose of the Lingam Massage is to create a space the receiver to
relax, and receive expanded pleasure from his Lingam. His partner (the
giver) experiences the joy of facilitating and witnessing the man
surrendering to his softer, gentler side. The Lingam Massage can be used
as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used) and is an excellent
process to build trust and intimacy. It is often used to help men heal
from negative sexual conditioning and trauma.
Orgasm is not the goal of the Lingam massage although it is often a
pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is to massage the Lingam,
also including testicles, perineum and Sacred Spot (the equivalent to
the female G-spot), and allow the man to surrender to a form of pleasure
he may not be used to. From this perspective both receiver and giver
relax into the massage.
Men need to learn to RELAX and RECEIVE. Traditional sexual conditioning
has the man in a doing and goal oriented mode. The Lingam Massage allows
the man to experience his softer, more receptive side and experience
pleasure from a non-traditional perspective.
Preparation:
Take a relaxing bath or shower. Take your time and breathe deeply.
Conscious, relaxed breathing will take you out of your mental process
and will get you more into your feelings. Relax your belly and let go of
the tension that most of us hold there.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best results occur when the bowels and bladder are empty.
Let go of your thoughts and connect with your partner through hugging,
holding, eye gazing (looking into each other's eyes for an extended
time), bringing both of you to a place of relaxation and trust.
Procedure:
Have the receiver lie on his back with pillows under his head so he can
look up at his partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel,
under his hips. His legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly
bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and his
genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers' legs.
Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Gently
massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, chest, nipples, etc., to get the
receiver to relax. Remind the receiver to breathe deeply and to sink
deeper into relaxation.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil (or water-based lubricant
when using latex gloves) on the shaft of the Lingam and testicles. Begin
gently massaging the testicles, taking care to not cause pain in this
sensitive area. Massage the scrotum gently, causing it to relax. Massage
the area above the Lingam, on the pubic bone. Massage the Perineum, the
area between the testicles and anus. Take your time. You are giving a
massage to an often neglected area of the body.
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Massage the shaft of the Lingam. Vary the speed and pressure. Gently
squeeze the Lingam at the base with your right hand, pull UP and slide
off and then alternate with your left hand. Take your time doing this,
right, left, right, left, etc. Then, change the direction by starting
the squeeze at the head of the Lingam/ penis and then sliding DOWN and
off. Again, alternate with right and left hands.
Massage the head of the Lingam as if you are using an orange juicer.
Massage all around the head and shaft. In Tantra there are many nerve
endings on the Lingam that correspond to other parts of the body. It is
said many ailments can be cured by receiving a good Lingam Massage.
NOTE: The Lingam may or may not go soft as you perform this technique.
Do not worry if it doesn't get hard again. You will probably find that
it will get hard, then go soft, get hard again, etc., which is a highly
desirable Tantric experience, like riding a wave, bobbing up and down.
Hardness and Softness are two ends of the pleasure spectrum.
If it appears that the receiver is going to ejaculate, back off,
allowing the Lingam to soften a little before resuming the massage. Do
this several times, coming close to ejaculation, and then backing off.
Remember, the goal is not orgasm in and of itself. Men can learn the art
of ejaculatory mastery and control by coming close to ejaculation and
then backing off on the stimulation. Deep breathing is key here and will
soften the urge to ejaculate. Eventually ejaculatory mastery will allow
you to make love as long as you want and you can become multi-orgasmic
without losing a drop of semen. Orgasm and ejaculation are two different
responses that you can learn to separate. The result is a very expanded
sex life.
Find and massage the male Sacred Spot. There are two ways to do this.
One is by finding the spot midway between the testicles and anus. There
is a small indentation about the size of a pea or maybe larger. Be
gentle and push inward. He will feel the pressure deep inside and it may
be intensely painful at first. Eventually, as this area is worked on
and softened, he will be able to expand his orgasms and master
ejaculatory control. You can massage his Lingam with your right hand and
massage his Sacred Spot with your left hand. Try pushing in on this
spot when he nears ejaculation. It is aptly named the Million Dollar
Point in Taoism.
The other way to access the Sacred Spot is through the anus. Many men,
especially heterosexual men, are uncomfortable at first as a result of
negative sexual conditioning. Be careful here and use lubrication. The
key is to go slow and be very gentle. Make sure he is breathing as you
slip a finger from your left hand into the anus about an inch or so.
Then crook the finger back in a "come here" gesture. You will feel the
prostate gland. Vary the pressure and speed of massage. He may want
stimulation of the Lingam as you massage the Sacred Spot. Back off on
the Lingam as he approaches orgasm and increase the pressure on the
Sacred Spot.
Sometimes the man may have strong emotions come up during access to the
Sacred Spot. He may cry and remember a traumatic event from his past.
You, the giver, are in a place of trust and intimacy. Allow him to feel
his emotions and be very loving, not trying to console or fix him, just
let him feel whatever he needs to. Encourage him to scream, cry, moan,
sob, if it feels appropriate. Be the best friend and healer he could
have in that moment.
Ending the Massage:
If he chooses to let go and ejaculate, encourage him to breathe deeply
during the orgasm. It will blow his mind, especially if he has come
close and held back at least SIX times before ejaculating. Holding back
six times charges up the sexual battery with tremendous energy. It is
then his choice as to where he wants to send this energy -- out with
their ejaculate (the prevailing paradigm) or inward for other uses (men
who master ejaculation are able to channel this energy into other areas
of their being).
When he feels complete with the massage gently remove your hands and
allow him to lie there quietly. You may want to snuggle up together or
you can leave the room and let him drift off into a meditative state.
Allow him to fully experience his childlike innocence and magnificent
male beauty.
Have fun with this technique and share it with your friends and loved ones
