[USPS] Well, don't I feel like Kaiser Wilhelm himself!

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So, my trustworthy, reliable, friendly supplier of my 50mg generic pills of love (Vi@gra, of course, not the Bill Cosby kind), a fellow I've made countless transactions with over the past 6 years, did his usual stellar job of getting the letter to the US from Asia in 5 days, and through Customs like greased lightning, less than an hour.  The next day it is at my distribution center, and the following morning it's out for delivery to my home...Where no one is present to sign for it, so a pink slip is left.  Not a problem, I just go to the USPS website and request a re-delivery - Which turns out to be a problem, as no one at the local carrier facility can find the letter.  Of course they don't tell ME that, they simply don't redeliver - And it is now a Saturday at 1300 hours, so the carrier facility is closed, can't call them until Monday.  When I do get around to calling them on Monday, the postmaster there (a nice fellow, Vietnam veteran, retired army, with a nice civil service job to coast into retirement on - We know each other in passing from the VFW bar and the occasions I've had to pick up orders of live chickens at the counter), assured me he'd look into it.

Around 1600 hours today (the mail had already run, around 1300 hours or so, again no letter), there's a knock at the door, and when I open it there stands our carrier, alongside the postmaster, who is holding my letter.  Convinced I'm about to be dragged off in chains (it's a 240 tablet order), instead, the postmaster hands me the package and tells the carrier "What did we discuss?"

"Sir," she says, "I am to look under, next to, and behind the seats of my delivery vehicle when I return from my route, and if I find anything I'm to immediately deliver it to the addressee, not wait until the following day."

The postmaster looks at me and winks, then he says "Sorry about that, Colonel b2g (army Lieutenant Colonels are often called "Colonel", as it is easier to say than "Lieutenant Colonel" - I retired as a Lieutenant Colonel, don't want anyone here thinking I was an actual full bull 0-6 Colonel...).  USPS doesn't exactly have what you could call 'Basic Training', but I don't think this problem will happen again.  See you at the VFW Thursday, sir."

After a few minutes the humor of it all hit me, and I laughed maniacally.  The wife came running to see what was on, and when I shook the letter at her and told her "The things I do to satisfy you, woman", she blushed, frowned, and then said "Well thank God the damn things are finally here."

 
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  2. D @ drdrizzy13: Yeah it was definitely a hold. Can't blame the refs for calling it. But I've seen many sketchy calls in the past to help the spread or over/under lol.
  3. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: Wonder how much money was impacted by that last touchdown and holding call back. The refs were flirting with the over/under payoffs… that flag either cost a lot people some money or won them a bunch. But I guess you can’t say it was a bad call, just a very impactful one.
  4. shoutback @ shoutback: Fucking A nfl season is over :( Those were by and far the best teams this season. That Elite D will just stifle mofos. And ya gotta give Darnold his flowers for taking care of the football. That was professional.
  5. M @ meepmoopmeep: Too bad that football season is over now
  6. M @ meepmoopmeep: Seahawks offense left more to be desired (esp during first half) but patriots offense was just abysmal. A win is a win though. Squawk squawk!
  7. shoutback @ shoutback: Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, I seem to have left a little squawk here and little squawk there
  8. L @ Layne_Cobain: Hey now @tiquanunderwood split the uprights my boy 😂 😂 jp homie
  9. L @ Layne_Cobain: I want Darnold to win it so bad classy guy all he’s been through
  10. L @ Layne_Cobain: LETS GO HAWKS F**K THE PATSIES
  11. tiquanunderwood @ tiquanunderwood: I have a girl coming over that's pretty cool. Besides that just chillin and making some food,.
  12. D @ drdrizzy13: I have tix to the Saints and Colts superbowl but sold them.
  13. D @ drdrizzy13: Anybody got any fun plans for the Superbowl?
  14. tiquanunderwood @ tiquanunderwood: GO MIKE MACDONALD AND THE HAWKS BABY!
  15. shoutback @ shoutback: Thanks 😊
  16. D @ drdrizzy13: Have a good run bro.
  17. D @ drdrizzy13: yeah i'd rather them win than the Pats
  18. shoutback @ shoutback: Oh and GO SEAHAWKS
  19. shoutback @ shoutback: Anyways I have to get ready to go on my run, it's been fun talking
  20. shoutback @ shoutback: I think when we have open discourse without preconceptions we all agree more than we disagree
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