No Worries, I get meds for my pain and I've taken them when I reallly could have held off but I wanted that high. If I weren't stuck on Klonopin for life like seriously if I don't take it they are going to have to put me in the Hospital, 17 years of my brain on that..it's way worse than any Opioid withdrawal, it doesn't let up or get better. So I decided: Life Motto.. if it helps a person function and improves quality of life, hurts no one, who cares? (yes withdrawals suck, but my Hubby and I can both work because we have pain meds...so I can afford to stay stocked) Life sucks enough already, I don't drink alcohol etc (all the wrong things are legal lol) and to me if like somebody isn't downing a bottle of whiskey then driving on the road (I've seen this..well I saw the aftermath) that's NOT Cool. The other worst was a friend ..great person~big heart, she was so hooked she was stealing, lying to everyone and she came to me crying cause she was just trying not to get sick, she never got the 'high' anymore..just maintaining. Anyway thanks for that, don't feel like a schmuck, I have days where I'm dealing with customers (online) and I'm like Screw this give me 2 Ativan (that I don't actually NEED and dip into the emergency stash for a roxy...that's just to get happy) I was I used to be like why can't I be normal, but anymore..with our govt and doctors..self medicating is THE NORM..My tolerance is so high from all the tramadol, that's why I was like Ok time to alternate with Kratom when I can~ So seriously live life with as little damage as possible, the sun is bad for you, red meat is bad for you, It's all bad lol so screw it, I hid mine from my ex husband, I would buy meds online (maxed out MY credit cards) he was a hardass Navy Seal like yes your bone is sticking out of your finger(..what doesn't kill you.. ) Yes thankfully my EX, my man now is a blessing but we are going thru this together (same accident) and we uh like a bit of a high every now and then from the stronger meds, he drinks a few beers I can't ..ulcers, diabetes. I'm totally big on like stocking up, daily meds (then strong meds I hide so well I forgot once where I put them and tore up the house looking -band aid box in bathroom that nobody uses) cash, meds for w/d I have clonodine, gabapentin, kratom ...I've been thru hell and I'm ready if it comes again lol And Another Ramble, My Kratom/Coffee is working time for me to get to work, I have to handcraft 20 different 'patriotic items by Monday ..great repeat customer tho. Peace ~ Jax