Hello all!
I have been a long time lurker but never get a chance to post, mostly just because im scared to with being anonymous, and idk, I have bad anxiety and social phobias, so im a heavy reader but a lightweight poster. I'm trying to change the way that I am, and start chatting with you guys and sharing the experience of my life and the way that i live today.
I use my username as clean995 because I am 4 months 2 weeks off of Heroin/opiate run (Fent**yl was the fav., old school Oatmeal Cookies, and pana's of course) of about 5 hard years. I began either late in high school or during the summer before College, had some great connections who were my best friends at the time, and was major spoiled. When all those went away passing the years, and only H or the Fen. was attainable to keep myself well, things got pretty bad. It was during this time of my life I was doing work, i wont go further, than to say that I made 6 figures during the summer of one year, and without my family knowing, I wen't from a normal addict, to a monster. I spent every last penny, which was a LOT, and i am saying this out of humility, please, the opposite of bragging. I got into trouble with the law, and also had a major addiction to rock.
Today, I am finding the root of my issues through recovery and found that I have extremely major bad anxiety and phobias, and go to a psychiatrist. I am on high dosages of benz0s, as well as IR 30mg adderall (weird mix, i know)....I still take 2mg suboxone everyday, and an anti-depressant. Before any of this, I hadn't even been to a doctor in years.
The main reason I frequent these boards is to just listen, but now ill start posting. I have found every necessary vendor that I need at this point, and have wonderful relationships with the best of them, all of whom I have found through the wonderful place your provide for us, here. /default_smile.png
I hope to make some friends, as I don't have many other people and tend to isolate. I definitely feel like even though i come here everyday, I don't necessarily post but I see people so smart like Heisenburg and take all the words spoken into so much respect and consideration, I just hope that people like him and the rest of you will befriend me; i have a lot of knowledge to offer this community, and I would love to be there as a friend for someone else just like I am reaching out for back from you guys.
All I can say is I <3 this place and this forum, and without it I don't know where I would be. Much love,
clean995
I have been a long time lurker but never get a chance to post, mostly just because im scared to with being anonymous, and idk, I have bad anxiety and social phobias, so im a heavy reader but a lightweight poster. I'm trying to change the way that I am, and start chatting with you guys and sharing the experience of my life and the way that i live today.
I use my username as clean995 because I am 4 months 2 weeks off of Heroin/opiate run (Fent**yl was the fav., old school Oatmeal Cookies, and pana's of course) of about 5 hard years. I began either late in high school or during the summer before College, had some great connections who were my best friends at the time, and was major spoiled. When all those went away passing the years, and only H or the Fen. was attainable to keep myself well, things got pretty bad. It was during this time of my life I was doing work, i wont go further, than to say that I made 6 figures during the summer of one year, and without my family knowing, I wen't from a normal addict, to a monster. I spent every last penny, which was a LOT, and i am saying this out of humility, please, the opposite of bragging. I got into trouble with the law, and also had a major addiction to rock.
Today, I am finding the root of my issues through recovery and found that I have extremely major bad anxiety and phobias, and go to a psychiatrist. I am on high dosages of benz0s, as well as IR 30mg adderall (weird mix, i know)....I still take 2mg suboxone everyday, and an anti-depressant. Before any of this, I hadn't even been to a doctor in years.
The main reason I frequent these boards is to just listen, but now ill start posting. I have found every necessary vendor that I need at this point, and have wonderful relationships with the best of them, all of whom I have found through the wonderful place your provide for us, here. /default_smile.png
I hope to make some friends, as I don't have many other people and tend to isolate. I definitely feel like even though i come here everyday, I don't necessarily post but I see people so smart like Heisenburg and take all the words spoken into so much respect and consideration, I just hope that people like him and the rest of you will befriend me; i have a lot of knowledge to offer this community, and I would love to be there as a friend for someone else just like I am reaching out for back from you guys.
All I can say is I <3 this place and this forum, and without it I don't know where I would be. Much love,
clean995