I myself was on methdone for about 4 years. I was a raving junkie and had tried everything to get clean, doing rattles, tapering down, swapping H for benzo 's, rehab/detox. And nothing worked, I would get a small amount of clean time, 4 weeks at most, and then pick up right where i left off. It was a cycle of addiction that i just couldn't break, no matter what I tried. Anyway after exhausting all possible avenues to get clean, the only other option available to me was H replacement treatment, either meth or subox. And although I wanted to get clean, I was a addict! I knew if i opted for subox the naloxon would stop me from using H and getting high, so despite all the horror stories, and knowing people who were in a worse position since starting a meth script, I chose meth anyway.
I'm in the UK, so I went to the drug clinic and got on meth. They asked me what I was using each day, and from that they estimated how much I would need everyday. They said i would need to be on between 90-120mg a day!!! So the first week they started me on 30mg and pushed it up 10mg every 5 days. However the whole time this process was happening I was still taking the same amount of H daily as before I started, Anyway when I reached 60mg a day I had a review, knowing how hard meth is to get off, i said I didn't want to go any higher, and I'd like to stay at 60mg and not go higher. But because I was still using and provided a dirty sample, they were adamant i should keep raising the dose, but I stuck to my guns, and started giving clean samples, or blagging/faking the test and continued on 60mg whilst still using intermittently.
After being on meth for about 2 years and still using H occasionally, probably every other day. I moved out of the area where I grew up to go live with family up North, where I had no connections or people I know, and finally kicked H altogether, and just took my 60mg of meth everyday. After 6 months of clean samples i gradually lowered my dose by 5mg every 2 months, and to be honest, I didn't get that many withdrawal symptoms, the only thing I vividly remember is waking up in the morning and feeling terrible till I had my dose. After a year of reducing i got down to 30mg a day and I was given 3 options...
Keep gradually reducing down, and it would most likely take around 2 years to get off.
Quit cold turkey and go into residential rehab for 100 days.
Or quit cold turkey, but take a drug called lefexodine. Which I was told would make the withdrawal a breeze, and I could easily detox at home with little to know withdrawal symptoms.
Obviously i chose the lefexodine option, as it sounded so easy and quick, with the least amount of pain and discomfort. Unfortunately that wasn't the case, the withdrawal was hellish!! The most intense physical symptoms, which are associated with opiates lasted about 6-8 weeks, but the insomnia, depression and anxiety lasted around 6 months!! It was unbearable, I didn't feel my normal self till about a year after coming off, and within that year I put alot of work in rewiring my mind, body and soul. It was intense! It felt like it would never end.
It's now been 3 years, and My life is pretty much back to normal. I still face challenges mentally and behaviour wise, but I'm in a better place. I have attended NA on and off, seen multiple psychiatrists, done CBT and I'm now on antidepressants. I do take drugs and drink every now and again, but there not the main focus of my life anymore, I can take them or leave them, and I always employ moderation in anything i take pleasure from.
I guess what I'm saying is meth should be a last resort, after you have exhausted all other possible avenues to get clean. And if you do have to go on meth, stay on as lower dose as possible, and treat it with respect. just know that eventually at some point your going have to get off meth too. Getting off meth was one of the hardest things I've ever done, and I've withdrawn off a lot of different substances. However for all the negatives, meth allowed me to rebuild My life and get back on track. And when it did come time to get off. i was a lot more prepared to do so, as I had sorted my life out whilst I was on it, and built a strong support network. Despite all the issues I have with meth, it also most likely saved my life!
I might of deviated from the discussion on this thread. But I just wanted to share my personal experience. In the hope that it will enlighten others who are in a similar predicament.
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happy indigenous peoples day
