Missing you....

[MuscledSheHulk]

hello, I'm sorry I have not logged on in a while,  and if I have it has been rather sporadic. Last Monday I had a head on collision. honestly, I'm not really even sure how it happened. I remember leaving the CVS parking lot in my hometown but apparently drove two miles north and ran a red light and hit someone head on in my Jeep. scariest thing ever. I have a concussion and I feel very alone... scared.  My body feels OK but my head is so very foggy. Everyone around me thinks that I'm on drugs. if they only knew at I have been waiting for the mailman to bring me some of the items I ordered. They would then know that I am sober and very scared. Of course the ambulance came to pick me up and transported me to the hospital, and of course a drug test was done because, who runs head on into another car at a stoplight unless they are on drugs right? they won't find any good drugs in my system. For the reasons stated above but also because of the sub-Devils that I am on and have been for quite some time. I saw my sub-devil Dr yesterday and he was quick to explain the process of concussions and then as quick to get me out, and oh by the way, that will be $300...Thank you and come again next month.

I guess I just wanted to let you all know where I had been because I have found this forum to be so helpful and I care about all of you that I've met.  I hope you all have had a good week.I look forward to the day when I am a little more clear headed and less confused with a little more purpose in life. Funny, I had a thought today, it passed so quickly, that I almost thought it wasn't mine.  "you will not live to be 38."  (my birthday was June 1st and I turned 36.)

kind of a scary thought for someone who has just turned 36. just a weird thought actually. Very brief. Not much feeling behind it. Just a matter of fact statement. I will not live to be 38. I wonder what that means?

I do look forward to looking back on this day and realizing how wrong I really was.  

 

[2earls]

That's frightening Shehulk and I'm glad you are still with us, even if it's in a haze. I have had those kinds of weird thoughts, but nothing ever comes of them. Just the other day, I had the feeling that I wasn't going to make it home alive. Weird, but here I am. I'm sure you will make it to 38 and far beyond. Rest up and feel better soon XOXO

 

[sociopathicbombshell]

Omg. oh my goodness. I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE OK. Just rest your eyes and dont aggrivate the concussion. MY little (big) strong girl. Xoxo. 

 

[bigs210]

@MuscledSheHulk I am so sorry to hear that I hope you get well soon msg me if you need to talk or anything

 

[mhzjunkie]

I was just thinking about you being MIA. I hope everything works out for you!

Oh, and I share the same weird thought/experience with you, but It was always in my head that I wouldn't make it past 30,(so much so that I dreaded my 30th birthday) that's just weird! But, that was many years ago... /default_smile.png

 

[PTFC]

Yeah, chin up girl, you're still here, and hopefully it won't happen again either. Focus. I'm ages with you, and I never thought I would get to 21 lol. Stay safe,  yeah.