Missing you....

MuscledSheHulk

MuscledSheHulk

Member
Joined
May 26, 2015
Messages
130
hello, I'm sorry I have not logged on in a while,  and if I have it has been rather sporadic. Last Monday I had a head on collision. honestly, I'm not really even sure how it happened. I remember leaving the CVS parking lot in my hometown but apparently drove two miles north and ran a red light and hit someone head on in my Jeep. scariest thing ever. I have a concussion and I feel very alone... scared.  My body feels OK but my head is so very foggy. Everyone around me thinks that I'm on drugs. if they only knew at I have been waiting for the mailman to bring me some of the items I ordered. They would then know that I am sober and very scared. Of course the ambulance came to pick me up and transported me to the hospital, and of course a drug test was done because, who runs head on into another car at a stoplight unless they are on drugs right? they won't find any good drugs in my system. For the reasons stated above but also because of the sub-Devils that I am on and have been for quite some time. I saw my sub-devil Dr yesterday and he was quick to explain the process of concussions and then as quick to get me out, and oh by the way, that will be $300...Thank you and come again next month.

I guess I just wanted to let you all know where I had been because I have found this forum to be so helpful and I care about all of you that I've met.  I hope you all have had a good week.I look forward to the day when I am a little more clear headed and less confused with a little more purpose in life. Funny, I had a thought today, it passed so quickly, that I almost thought it wasn't mine.  "you will not live to be 38."  (my birthday was June 1st and I turned 36.)

kind of a scary thought for someone who has just turned 36. just a weird thought actually. Very brief. Not much feeling behind it. Just a matter of fact statement. I will not live to be 38. I wonder what that means?

I do look forward to looking back on this day and realizing how wrong I really was.  

 
That's frightening Shehulk and I'm glad you are still with us, even if it's in a haze. I have had those kinds of weird thoughts, but nothing ever comes of them. Just the other day, I had the feeling that I wasn't going to make it home alive. Weird, but here I am. I'm sure you will make it to 38 and far beyond. Rest up and feel better soon XOXO

 
Omg. oh my goodness. I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE OK. Just rest your eyes and dont aggrivate the concussion. MY little (big) strong girl. Xoxo. 

 
I was just thinking about you being MIA. I hope everything works out for you!

Oh, and I share the same weird thought/experience with you, but It was always in my head that I wouldn't make it past 30,(so much so that I dreaded my 30th birthday) that's just weird! But, that was many years ago... /default_smile.png

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Yeah, chin up girl, you're still here, and hopefully it won't happen again either. Focus. I'm ages with you, and I never thought I would get to 21 lol. Stay safe,  yeah.

 
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  1. xenxra @ xenxra: @WTF7218 it may as well be that way with how little effort some of the people on here make to find information that's exactly where you would expect it to be.
  2. ontovzik @ ontovzik: When I had long term shingles, lasting two months. All he could give me was a 10 day supply of dilaudid. He looked at the ground while we were talking about it. I could tell he was ashamed but it was the legislature and the governor that tied his hands. He was very upset that non-medical political people, the media, and the scared public were controlling how he treated his patients. Someday those people will need meds and a hospital bed and they will be gone.
  3. ontovzik @ ontovzik: I had a great doctor, he had the true gift of a healer and he stayed on top of all the science. He straight up told me that for many people opiods work for managing short and long term pain.
  4. ontovzik @ ontovzik: He peed it in the snow in my backyard.
  5. WTF7218 @ WTF7218: @xenxra 😆😂. Yes, but only a few brave souls will ever find the number. You must first order a Dirty Shirley from the bartender. Then you must discreetly take the cocktail napkin from under your drink and unfold it. There you will find the map to the location of the phone number, and clues to decipher the code that it is written in.
  6. xenxra @ xenxra: he left his phone number scribbled in a stall at the pub three blocks down
  7. N @ NYStateofMind: @Alkazar I would try one of those easy online ones .. reddit gives useful info about that
  8. Alkazar @ Alkazar: @NYStateofMind I dont really have a history of abusing things, my docotr is just really stingy. I am thinking of switching.
  9. C @ Cheesus: Thanks xenxra
  10. xenxra @ xenxra: @Cheesus yeah, use snote
  11. P @ psychedpsych: Trump is cracking down….
  12. P @ psychedpsych: Hackers are the scum of the earth
  13. N @ NYStateofMind: so it was easy bc of my history
  14. N @ NYStateofMind: I didnt really tell him but he knew I needed a new script since my dr went to jail
  15. N @ NYStateofMind: @xenxra I was on Adderall since 15 years ago so my dr prescribed that w no problems and then when I lost my best friend my doctor rxed the valiums but
  16. C @ Cheesus: Temp.pm down for anyone else?
  17. xenxra @ xenxra: @NYStateofMind my doctor's have always been pretty open minded if i can actually come in and explain the pharmacological action of the drugs im seeking instead of just telling them why i think i should be prescribed. the only time it didn't work out for me is when i was trying pharmaceuticals for depression ten years ago and suggested they let me try testosterone instead (turns out i was hypogonadal so they made a mistake denying my request at face value)
  18. T @ Testisthebest: Even down here in Florida when the pill mill docs all switched over to Suboxone and/or retired you can still find some pretty liberal docs but you gotta know what to look for. Mine does "pain management, detox, anxiety,etc. And no insurance. My doc writes me 60 5mg Valium, 14 2mg Xanax and asked if I had ever tried adderal to get more focus at work as I told him I run my own business.
  19. N @ NYStateofMind: @Alkazar do they know your history? Like I dont tell my doctor anything about myself except what they need to know,...I was able to get my dr to rx the highest dose of adderall along with valiums ..... if they dont know your history or there is no history I would just come out and ask what is the reason for their mistreatment.... they have no problem billing your insurance or taking a payment for the visit
  20. T @ Turbo259: @Layne_Cobain Thank you fam
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