Missing you....

Joined
May 26, 2015
Messages
130
hello, I'm sorry I have not logged on in a while,  and if I have it has been rather sporadic. Last Monday I had a head on collision. honestly, I'm not really even sure how it happened. I remember leaving the CVS parking lot in my hometown but apparently drove two miles north and ran a red light and hit someone head on in my Jeep. scariest thing ever. I have a concussion and I feel very alone... scared.  My body feels OK but my head is so very foggy. Everyone around me thinks that I'm on drugs. if they only knew at I have been waiting for the mailman to bring me some of the items I ordered. They would then know that I am sober and very scared. Of course the ambulance came to pick me up and transported me to the hospital, and of course a drug test was done because, who runs head on into another car at a stoplight unless they are on drugs right? they won't find any good drugs in my system. For the reasons stated above but also because of the sub-Devils that I am on and have been for quite some time. I saw my sub-devil Dr yesterday and he was quick to explain the process of concussions and then as quick to get me out, and oh by the way, that will be $300...Thank you and come again next month.

I guess I just wanted to let you all know where I had been because I have found this forum to be so helpful and I care about all of you that I've met.  I hope you all have had a good week.I look forward to the day when I am a little more clear headed and less confused with a little more purpose in life. Funny, I had a thought today, it passed so quickly, that I almost thought it wasn't mine.  "you will not live to be 38."  (my birthday was June 1st and I turned 36.)

kind of a scary thought for someone who has just turned 36. just a weird thought actually. Very brief. Not much feeling behind it. Just a matter of fact statement. I will not live to be 38. I wonder what that means?

I do look forward to looking back on this day and realizing how wrong I really was.  

 
That's frightening Shehulk and I'm glad you are still with us, even if it's in a haze. I have had those kinds of weird thoughts, but nothing ever comes of them. Just the other day, I had the feeling that I wasn't going to make it home alive. Weird, but here I am. I'm sure you will make it to 38 and far beyond. Rest up and feel better soon XOXO

 
Omg. oh my goodness. I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE OK. Just rest your eyes and dont aggrivate the concussion. MY little (big) strong girl. Xoxo. 

 
I was just thinking about you being MIA. I hope everything works out for you!

Oh, and I share the same weird thought/experience with you, but It was always in my head that I wouldn't make it past 30,(so much so that I dreaded my 30th birthday) that's just weird! But, that was many years ago... /default_smile.png

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Yeah, chin up girl, you're still here, and hopefully it won't happen again either. Focus. I'm ages with you, and I never thought I would get to 21 lol. Stay safe,  yeah.

 
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  1. P @ psychedpsych: Everything in this scene has gotten strange, like that first push off a skateboard with a huge in front of jus waiting for the speed wobbles. Careful everyone. That first push when AI was updated to all our phone unless you have time to download a safe operating system for the(pretty much only pixels can, paid off.
  2. Dr-Octagon @ Dr-Octagon: Like Doc to the Oh to the C, i spit G.R.I.M to the E. Then bob ya head the beat fron S.double U to the N to the E
  3. Dr-Octagon @ Dr-Octagon: @oh be g its all about that yeet famo
  4. xenxra @ xenxra: step 1 - stack yo bread / step 2 - go to bed
  5. xenxra @ xenxra: just keep it one hunna playa, it's really simple
  6. O @ oh be g: pull your pants up too son
  7. O @ oh be g: "keep it one hunnid," wtf is ths
  8. xenxra @ xenxra: every day is friday
  9. 3 @ 3ak: @xenxra damn shame, can't find any of the rc stims
  10. xenxra @ xenxra: @3ak mostly, will prob be gone entirely by end of summer imo
  11. F @ frozenSR17: hope everyone has a nice start 2 their weekend. "keep it one hunnid," as someone once said to me
  12. 3 @ 3ak: 4f-mph dried up?
  13. xenxra @ xenxra: pretty sure black also went rogue sometime late last year
  14. Strawhat7 @ Strawhat7: Yo, whatever happened to Mr. Black? Just got a rando email from him after ghosting me like a year and a half ago
  15. LW815 @ LW815: Know what’s really going on in somebody else’s head or how much they’re really dealing with and feel like they’re left with no other options. Been a very sad few days but 2 complete (irl anyway) strangers cared enough about what I was going through to talk to me about it, though they owe me nothing and have no reason to help my personal pain other than the kindness in their own hearts. Just shows that this place is a real community, not just a forum of people who only care about themselves.
  16. LW815 @ LW815: Was nodding in/out the entire time writing those shouts and spparently was fully out sending the last one lol. But II find it ‘uplifting’ as two people I’ve never actually met and only know the others online presence through subscriptions, who I have a better chance of getting a handy J from Jesus Christ himself, both were so quick to share their own experience and wise words and assurances that things will look up and not to feel guilty or be mad at somebody for going that route - as you never
  17. xenxra @ xenxra: @hotdog45 meh, same difference. they both got blacklisted on here. wouldn't be the first time a rogue shop sent out unsolicited comms after the fact.
  18. MOD @ MOD: Hello @everyone
  19. LW815 @ LW815: Own personal experience with this kind of this type kind of situation and sympathized with my pain when I really just needed somebody to talk to. Both went out of their way to help a stranger in a time of need when I really needed somebody, and body to talk to. MM
  20. LW815 @ LW815: Sent a simple conf email and I just dropped a ball on them. I really just needed to let it out, didn’t expect them to reply in such a thoughtful way that it drastically changed the rest of my day and mindset for the bette . Above and beyond - and the last night while chatting with another that I knew had at least once one child,, so i wished them a belated happy Father’s Day, which again caused me to spill it all to them and again received the most thoughtful and kind response, as well as their-
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