@Whoopiegoldburgg222 I brought back some goodies for you from the DN (don't ask, personal project lately), and I'm actually about to answer your OP. I cannot take credit for all of this, but I left my personal comments below in purple.
Tutorial for Super Secure Monero Purchases
1. Buy Bitcoin by any means necessary, it doesn't matter if you link your personal identity to this purchase.
2. Once you have your Bitcoin, withdraw it into a holding wallet.
-- At this stage, ensure you're using a secure environment like Tails --
Yeah maybe we can come up with a better option for people not using DNM's. I think having a VPN running should be enough ( @DoomKitty can you confirm this?) Or maybe it is enough just to install the TOR browser to perform these steps with a VPN setup? Your non-tor browser is leaving a lot of fingerprints and identifying information.
3. Use one of the many Bitcoin > XMR exchanges, send your funds to a fresh XMR wallet.
I used the CakeWallet app for this step because you can exchange funds and keep an XMR wallet, but this goes against the "secure environment" instruction. CakeWallet is pretty straightforward, but I can do a separate tutorial on that if needed. See below for desktop alternatives.
4. Send the funds from the first XMR wallet to a new XMR wallet.
For this step you can just use one of the Monero wallets. They have a GUI and a command line interface. I installed both. I did this all from Tails (which is just Debian Linux), but there are downloads for Windows https://www.getmonero.org/downloads/ I believe this step is suppose to break the chain and make you untraceable.
5. Your XMR is now ready for use on any market you so desire.
- You always send your Bitcoin from the exchange into a wallet you hold, this is to prevent the exchange from holding payments to addresses they have "deemed" as illegal. While BTC > XMR exchanges are not exactly illegal, or do they have the ability to obtain every address used by said exchange it's best just to do this to avoid any risk. My sources for this are when sites like Coinbase track certain addresses and prevent withdrawals to them.
- You always send your exchanged XMR to a separate wallet to avoid direct contact with the first wallet (which has a link to your Bitcoin).
This entire process (assuming XMR has no security flaws) is 99% secure, the 1% accounts for acts of god. Now can you still get caught? Sure, the drugs that are sent can most of the time always be linked with somebody/something that likely has a link to you. If the drugs are found and you do get caught an audit of your bank account/payment method could be found which would match up with the approximate value of the Bitcoin you purchased.
Is this likely to happen? Probably not.
More Tips:
A few are written by me:
- Other Bitcoin > XMR exchanges besides CakeWallet (remember, we should always be in a secure environment and apparently doing anything on your phone puts you at risk).
These require no KYC:
https://www.morphtoken.com/
MorphScript (you can use on your own MorphScript, without an account)
Elude (
http://elude.in/ doesn't seem to work on my clearnet browser)
Unlink
Bisq