Nye Date Nightmare - Share Your Story

peanut

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It 'twas the night before new year, and Peanut's plans were abruptly cancelled. My buddy and his woman came down with the flu bug the day earlier, and after stopping over in the morning to check on them, we decided it was best for them to stay home. We definitely do not need more people going out in public when they do not have to when they have the virus, as we all know how it is spread. Anyways, it was about 2:00p.m. on NYE and all of my plans officially were a bust. I had other options but they either involved people or places that I did not want to associate with at the moment. So what do I do?? Nothing.

I decided to go and chill with my Dad for the evening (don't worry not my date!) as he decided not to take the hour trip to his friend's house in another state. We ate dinner and took the little ones (dogs) for a long walk out in the fields. Around 10p.m. is when the night started to get interesting.

I recieved a text from a dating site that I had joined a while back. Nothing ever really came out of this site, chatted with some females that's about it. The text was from a chick about 40 minutes or so away. Her pictures were decent, has no kids, and her plans were busted too. I didn't really ask why, and as we chatted we both came to the conclusion that we were bored, and should hang out. So I fired up my buggy, and let it warm up for a bit as we chatted on the phone before my journey was about to start.

Eventually I arrived there, and she met me outside. She said that I had to be very quiet and that she was sneaking me in (she is 30 years old). This left me thinking should I just run as fast as I can to my car, or say fuck it and obey her rules. Being a male, and not thinking with the right head, I quietly headed inside. After I got in I found out that she lives with her Aunt & Uncle (which is cool I guess, not sure why I had to "sneak" in. So the first thing I notice when we get inside and into a room with light in it, is that her pics were about 3-5 years old. She told me they were old, I just really don't remember. I don't mind a chick with some "curves" at all, not one bit. But she was false advertising with her pics!! She was at a very low estimate about 100lbs heavier than in her pics, which was not really what I was expecting. I was thinking to myself, I am already here, so I might as well try to enjoy it.

We went ahead and started to watch a movie, in a really small room, with the only place to sit being the bed. I was cool with that, it's whatever, better than the floor. We didn't really chat that much, the conversation was pretty boring. Also she kept hacking and complaining about her chest cold (ya HUGE turn on). She then went ahead and downed about half a bottle of robotussin (however its spelled) and we continued watching the movie. She turned a fan on to drown out the noise to prevent anybody from waking up. I started to get cold, and she invited me under the blankets. Nothing happened, which at this point I would have said something like I forgot my Viagra or something to get out of it, considering the fact I cancelled plans due to illness(s). About half an hour later, I yawned a few times, and she asked if I was tired. I said yes and she said I better get going since I am driving. That was the highlight of my night, getting out of there and back home!!

The next day I noticed a small red spot on my arm. I figured eh whatever just a nice beauty mark, it will go away in a day or two. So today (1/2) I noticed 3 more bites on my arm. I am thinking what the hell was in this chick's bed??? She said there are 2 or 3 cats in the house, but WTF? Do people not check their animals for things, and if they do and cure it, do they not wash their sheets?? Needless to say, my sheets and any article of clothing that I came into contact with since then is soaking in HOT water in the washer as we speak. Ugh....that was my NYE nightmare.

Oh ya just a FYI - I did NOT kiss, touch (esp after I heard the weezing cough for a non smoker), or anything else with her. Just want to be 100% clear on that. I do not drink, so there was no alcohol involved (even though she asked me to bring some).

Anybody want to share their shitty NYE dates? Feel free too, open thread.

 
Entertaining story. Are you sure she was 30 y.o. The sneaking you in and asking you to bring alcohol sounds like someone younger.

Bed bugs???? If that's what it is then you need to be proactive because those can be a real nightmare to get rid of once they establish themselves. I'm sure you've seen all the recent reports on TV and stuff. They love to hitch rides and that's how the spread. From what I've heard/seen washing the stuff in hot water isn't enough. Good luck and hope you kill whatever it is before they get out of control

That would have been hilarious if you did decide to just run. Do you think the pics were even her? 100+ pound weight gain at 30 seem like a lot unless she just had a baby.

See how much trouble that other head can get you in. LOL

 
Just an update. Washed everything and it's all good. I have sensitive skin - allergic to a lot of different laundry soaps and such. She sent me a few text msgs, I replied out of boredom. Not planning on seeing her or talking to her again! I also deleted my profile on the site - back to the old school dating/hook ups lol. The bar!

 
Peanut!!

OMG!!! Your post has provided endless bouts of hysterical laughter - tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. Thank you!!! It's my new go-to when I need a good fit of the giggles.

You had me at 100lbs!

LOL!

Bloom

 
Peanut!!

OMG!!! Your post has provided endless bouts of hysterical laughter - tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. Thank you!!! It's my new go-to when I need a good fit of the giggles.

You had me at 100lbs!

LOL!

Bloom
Wel I am glad I was able to provide a nice laugh for ya! It was an adventure, that's for sure. On a side note, and I think this is pretty awesome, on the drive home I saw a shooting star, and about 4 miles later right before my driveway a coyote ran out in front of me. I live in an area where they are pretty rare (at least for people to see). Those two things made my night!!

I really could write a book/movie script with all of the crazy things that happen in my life. It would be a borderline comedy/drama/horror/action/adventure movie. I am not sure who I would pick to play myself in the movie.

 
I had a great New Years Eve. I spent it with three girls! All had blonde hair like Goldilocks. Yes, indeed, but only one was just right. She stood in a dress, high heels and tights. Though I felt fright, I knew it was right. She looked liked a fairy, all covered in glitter, then I remembered I forgot to bring my pack of blister. Oh. No Valium - I'm scared! But she quickly whisked away my fear. Yes, I had ample supply of beer! But her smile was warm, inviting and kind, the children however were all up in my mind! She told me to bring ring pops, but with none to find, I found other goodies of a similar kind!

She was playful. Such a delight. And the intimidation soared out of sight. Surely I was in for some wonderful nights! Fairies and butterflies danced into my sight. I saw beauty and sweetness like never before. However, on New Year's Day I found myself laying on the couch in a snore. I could ask for nothing more! Until two Goldilocks rushed to my care. Oranges, muffins and even s'mores! Then the most fairest of all, rushed me upstairs for a light kiss and more snores. When I awoke, there was so much more in store.

Unfortunately, like a phantom, I had to return to the dark beyond grasp, but found that I enjoyed her more than my past. So indeed, I visited again. Tonight I lay with her, and I'm on an ascent!

Dperson

 
I had a great New Years Eve. I spent it with three girls! All had blonde hair like Goldilocks. Yes, indeed, but only one was just right. She stood in a dress, high heels and tights. Though I felt fright, I knew it was right. She looked liked a fairy, all covered in glitter, then I remembered I forgot to bring my pack of blister. Oh. No Valium - I'm scared! But she quickly whisked away my fear. Yes, I had ample supply of beer! But her smile was warm, inviting and kind, the children however were all up in my mind! She told me to bring ring pops, but with none to find, I found other goodies of a similar kind!

She was playful. Such a delight. And the intimidation soared out of sight. Surely I was in for some wonderful nights! Fairies and butterflies danced into my sight. I saw beauty and sweetness like never before. However, on New Year's Day I found myself laying on the couch in a snore. I could ask for nothing more! Until two Goldilocks rushed to my care. Oranges, muffins and even s'mores! Then the most fairest of all, rushed me upstairs for a light kiss and more snores. When I awoke, there was so much more in store.

Unfortunately, like a phantom, I had to return to the dark beyond grasp, but found that I enjoyed her more than my past. So indeed, I visited again. Tonight I lay with her, and I'm on an ascent!

Dperson
That was lovely. I'm happy for you Deperson.

 
I had a great New Years Eve. I spent it with three girls! All had blonde hair like Goldilocks. Yes, indeed, but only one was just right. She stood in a dress, high heels and tights. Though I felt fright, I knew it was right. She looked liked a fairy, all covered in glitter, then I remembered I forgot to bring my pack of blister. Oh. No Valium - I'm scared! But she quickly whisked away my fear. Yes, I had ample supply of beer! But her smile was warm, inviting and kind, the children however were all up in my mind! She told me to bring ring pops, but with none to find, I found other goodies of a similar kind!

She was playful. Such a delight. And the intimidation soared out of sight. Surely I was in for some wonderful nights! Fairies and butterflies danced into my sight. I saw beauty and sweetness like never before. However, on New Year's Day I found myself laying on the couch in a snore. I could ask for nothing more! Until two Goldilocks rushed to my care. Oranges, muffins and even s'mores! Then the most fairest of all, rushed me upstairs for a light kiss and more snores. When I awoke, there was so much more in store.

Unfortunately, like a phantom, I had to return to the dark beyond grasp, but found that I enjoyed her more than my past. So indeed, I visited again. Tonight I lay with her, and I'm on an ascent!

Dperson
So this was a dream?

 
Yes, but a very good one. Shame about yours! Good read though! Me and Bloom laughed a lot.
LOL. Dreams like that are a love/hate. Like when you are just about to bang a super super hot chick and all of a sudden you wake up with your dog standing on your chest licking your face to wake you up. After letting him out to potty, you close your eyes hoping to dream the outcome and then once it starts to come back the alarm clock goes off, Grrrr.

 
Peanut!

Peanut, Peanut, Peanut. There is no man alive who could combine a sentence with "super super hot chick" and "dog standing on your chest licking your face," except, of course, someone with your experience and wit! Well done my friend! It provided another bout of giggles - better than the last! You're a hoot!

Deperson and I wrote the "dream" together last night. We wrote it line by line - he'd hand me the IPad and I'd type a sentence and then he would type a sentence - and so on! Of course, there's a lot more to say about our NYE assemblage (and the "other" two Goldilocks are my young daughters) - but it would never compare to the joy and laughter your posts have provided.

But I will share this, I have two chocolate Labs and Deperson never awoke with one of my dogs standing on his chest licking his face!

LOL!

Bloom

 
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