The Hooker

spiderman

spiderman

Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2014
Messages
177
 


[SIZE=13.5pt]An Illegal Immigrant picks up a hooker.[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]"Hey, how mucha you chargefora hour, ?"[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=10pt]He asks.[/SIZE]​










[SIZE=24pt]"$100"[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]she replies.[/SIZE]​
 ​


[SIZE=24pt]In broken English, he says,[/SIZE]​


[SIZE=24pt]"You do immigrant style?[/SIZE]​


 ​


[SIZE=24pt]"No"[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]she says.[/SIZE]​


[SIZE=24pt]"I pay you $200 you do immigrant style."[/SIZE]​


[SIZE=24pt]"No,"[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]she says, not knowing what immigrant style is.[/SIZE]​


 ​

[SIZE=24pt]"I pay you $300."[/SIZE]​
[SIZE=24pt]"No,"[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]she says.[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]"I pay you $400.[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]"No,"[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]she says.[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]So finally he says,[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]"OK, I pay $1,000 you do immigrant style."[/SIZE]​
[SIZE=24pt]She thinks,[/SIZE][SIZE=7pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]"Well, I've been in the game for over 10 years now.
I've had every kind of request from weirdoes[/SIZE][SIZE=10pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]from every part of the world.[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=24pt]How bad could immigrant style be?[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=24pt]So she agrees and has sex with him.[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=24pt]Finally, they finish.[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says,[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=24pt]"Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting.[/SIZE]​

[SIZE=24pt]But that was ok.[/SIZE][SIZE=10pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=24pt]So, what exactly is immigrant style?"[/SIZE]​

 ​

[SIZE=24pt]The illegal immigrant replies,[/SIZE]​



[SIZE=24pt]"You senda bill to Government."[/SIZE]​













































 
 
 
LMAO Spidy!

Q: What do you get when you cross a hooker with a systems engineer?
A: A fuckin know-it-all!
 
Q: What do you call kids born in whorehouses?
A: Brothel sprouts.
 
Q: Did you hear about the hooker that had her appendix taken out?
A: Now she does business on the side!
 
Q: What do you call an Italian hooker?
A: a pastatute.
 
Q: Did you know that O.J. Simpson, Monica Lewinsky, Ted Kennedy, and President Bill Clinton are all avid golfers?
A: O.J.'s a slicer, Monica's a hooker, Ted Kennedy can't drive over water, and Clinton can't seem to hit the right hole!
 
Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a hooker?
A: A hooker because she can wash her crack and reuse it.
 
Q: What do you call a Serbian prostitute?
A: Sloberdown Mycockyoubitch
 
Q: What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common?
A: They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed.
 
Q: Did you hear about the Chinese prostitute that had a black baby?
A: She named him Sum Ting Wong!
 
Q: Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backward?
A: They like the part where the hooker gives the money back.
 
Q: How many cops does it take to push a hooker down the stairs?
A: None "She fell"
 
Q: What's the difference between an epileptic oyster fisherman, and a hooker with diahrrea?
A: Well, one shucks between fits.
 
Q: What do you tell a Hooker with 2 black eyes?
A: Nothing. You've already told her twice!
 
Q: Whats the difference between a hooker and a Kit Kat?
A: You only get 4 fingers in a Kit Kat!
 
Q: Why did the Hooker fall out of the tree?
A: Because, she was dead!
 
Q: What do you call a Hooker with no legs?
A: A nightcrawler!
 
Q: What's the difference between your job and a Dead Hooker?
A: Your job still sucks!
 
Q: What's the difference between a whore and a bitch?
A: Whore's fuck everyone at the party, Bitches fuck everyone at the party except you.
 
Q: What's the difference between Jello and a Dead Hooker?
A: Jello wiggles when you eat it!
 
Q: What's the difference between a Dead Hooker in the road and a dead dog in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dead dog!
 
Q: What's the difference between a Corvette and a Dead Hooker?
A: I don't have a Corvette in my garage!
 
Q: What do you do if your hooker is running around screaming and bleeding in your hotel room?
A: Shoot her again!
 
Q: What's the difference between an onion and a hooker?
A: You don't cry when you chop up a hooker!
 
Q: If a new whore uses vasoline, what does an old whore use?
A: An old whore uses poly-grip!
 
Q: Why do Republican politicians never conduct business on the same street where a prostitute is working?
A: Professional courtesy!
 
Q: What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a Hooker?
A: Tiger can work his balls both ways!
 
Q: How bad is the California economy?
A: Even the hookers are taking I.O.U's
 
Q: What do you get when you cross Tiger Woods and a dinosaur?
A: Lick a lot of puss.
 
Q: Why does Tiger play a round of golf with a prostitute?
A: To get a hairy hole in one.
 
 
 
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  1. xenxra @ xenxra: every day is friday
  2. 3 @ 3ak: @xenxra damn shame, can't find any of the rc stims
  3. xenxra @ xenxra: @3ak mostly, will prob be gone entirely by end of summer imo
  4. F @ frozenSR17: hope everyone has a nice start 2 their weekend. "keep it one hunnid," as someone once said to me
  5. 3 @ 3ak: 4f-mph dried up?
  6. xenxra @ xenxra: pretty sure black also went rogue sometime late last year
  7. Strawhat7 @ Strawhat7: Yo, whatever happened to Mr. Black? Just got a rando email from him after ghosting me like a year and a half ago
  8. LW815 @ LW815: Know what’s really going on in somebody else’s head or how much they’re really dealing with and feel like they’re left with no other options. Been a very sad few days but 2 complete (irl anyway) strangers cared enough about what I was going through to talk to me about it, though they owe me nothing and have no reason to help my personal pain other than the kindness in their own hearts. Just shows that this place is a real community, not just a forum of people who only care about themselves.
  9. LW815 @ LW815: Was nodding in/out the entire time writing those shouts and spparently was fully out sending the last one lol. But II find it ‘uplifting’ as two people I’ve never actually met and only know the others online presence through subscriptions, who I have a better chance of getting a handy J from Jesus Christ himself, both were so quick to share their own experience and wise words and assurances that things will look up and not to feel guilty or be mad at somebody for going that route - as you never
  10. xenxra @ xenxra: @hotdog45 meh, same difference. they both got blacklisted on here. wouldn't be the first time a rogue shop sent out unsolicited comms after the fact.
  11. MOD @ MOD: Hello @everyone
  12. LW815 @ LW815: Own personal experience with this kind of this type kind of situation and sympathized with my pain when I really just needed somebody to talk to. Both went out of their way to help a stranger in a time of need when I really needed somebody, and body to talk to. MM
  13. LW815 @ LW815: Sent a simple conf email and I just dropped a ball on them. I really just needed to let it out, didn’t expect them to reply in such a thoughtful way that it drastically changed the rest of my day and mindset for the bette . Above and beyond - and the last night while chatting with another that I knew had at least once one child,, so i wished them a belated happy Father’s Day, which again caused me to spill it all to them and again received the most thoughtful and kind response, as well as their-
  14. LW815 @ LW815: They didn’t need to. They could have just continued on with the nature or the main purpose of what the relationship between us is, I didn’t really have anybody else to let it out to at the time and they both went far beyond what I’d expect. Not that I’d assumed they’re cold/A-holes - it was just a lot from somebody who’s technically a competent stranger. A very close friend of mine committed suicide on Father’s Day and iwas emotionally wrecked witih nobody to talk to, and the first author just
  15. LW815 @ LW815: @Mokachin0 not really uplifting in the normal sense, but two popular authors on here took the time out of their likely very busy days to not only read my massive walls of text, but both also replied with the most kind, thoughtful and positive responses when I randomly dumped my personal problems into their laps
  16. H @ hotdog45: I have never ordered mags from him I meant
  17. H @ hotdog45: @xenxra I thought that too but after digging on the site it is chemical cabinet. Either way I deleted the email. I have ordered mags from him, but I thought you guys should know he's reaching out to people again. After reading the thread if anyone gets an email from him I would suggest doing the same.
  18. xenxra @ xenxra: @hotdog45 isn't that ghost? he threw his rep in the trash and got blacklisted
  19. O @ oh be g: thank you! hopefully this will inpsirw someone!
  20. M @ Mokachin0: @oh be g check your dms!
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