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smckee83

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Hello. My name is Shane. I don't know if I'm aloud to say this,  And it's actually quite embarrassing to admit, but here goes... I'm a 35 year old man and suffer from drug addiction, chronic alcoholism, and depression  (gee I wonder why hehe) I have an amazing young girlfriend, whom I consider my wife and am doing my best to help her wonderful children  (and doing a horrible job sadly) I have been involved with the internet pharmaceutical "scene " since 2001 after my father passed when I was 17. I was a member of a forum much like this one called drugseekers. I was introduced to several "pharmacies" but my main go to was a Canadian email source called upnorthproductions  (oxycontin, gbl, mdma,) and murad. Located out of Pakistan or India can't remember  (xan, val, and ritz. They even offered sodium pentothal and ketamine God I miss them. Anyway just wanted to say hi. I would love to donate but for the life of me can't figure out bitcoin. Trust me I've tried. It would open up a lot of opportunities for me. Well anyway, my name is Shane. I'm a 35 year old drunk drug addict. I'm a horrible person. But it's nice to meet you guys. Hope I can contribute and maybe help someone out. :)

 
Hi Shane. Nice to meet you. If you need help getting bc @dm1n posted this. Also, don't be so hard on yourself. There are many ways to look at things. For example. I don't see myself as a pill head. I see myself as a victim of an uninformative and over prescribing doctor who bailed on all his patients when the heat got turned up on him. 

 
Welcome (again). It must have been very hard to lose your father at 17. Grief is relentless. I lost my brother and mother within 3 months of one another a few years ago, along with 6 more relatives and 2 dogs over a 2-year span following. But I wasn’t just a kid at the time, so I can’t even imagine.

 
Thanks guys. That actually means a lot. I hear the same words you say from loved ones all the time (I'm extremely grateful and proud to have people I can consider loved ones btw ). But to hear it from a stranger, that has nothing to gain, I dunno. It kind of means more in some weird way. Does that make sense? And Gracie, I spoke to you in another thread and you were just so warm and welcoming. I'm not trying to be all corny but that was just awesome and not something I'm used to. Thank you for that. I got a feeling you're most likely an all around awesome person to be around. I bet your friends and family are happy to have you around. Thanks to both of you for your words of encouragement and your friendly welcome.I honestly believe this rotted rock we call earth would be such a great place to live out my existence if everybody was like you  (no offense to anybody. I'm sure their are plenty of other great people here. And no offense to you assholes either. You serve an important purpose, just wish I didn't have to deal with you, because I hate you :) )anyway, I tend to ramble, in case you couldn't tell heh. Thanks guys. And as lame and corny as this sounds, I love you. I don't expect you to understand just how much your kindness means to me :)

 
@smckee83 you don't sound like a horrible person to me!  You obviously appreciate your lovely girlfriend and help with children that aren't your own.  We're all here for different reasons but I guess we're all in the same boat.  I think you'll find a lot of support here and people you can connect with.  I've made some real friends here.  If there's anything we can help you with just ask.  

Welcome!!!

 
@smckee83 We all have a story and not one person I know without any demons. 

I have found cashapp to be the easiest way to buy bitcoin. You do need to verify with ID though and takes about a week. A little sooner if you harass them. Good luck with your journey 

 
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  1. ClintEastwood @ ClintEastwood: Just wondering if anyone well trusted has a supply of research thienos or benz in powders for good average prices? Or could give a shout out from me to him? Or the best lowest per each? I’ve seen some cool and some i just know are worth it. Good price rv presses too but it is much more bang for your buck. I have one good vendor. But am looking for variety’s well. Send me a message or reply if you think any. Thanks - CLINT E. Any Heavy stuff too which all seem about the ssmmmmmm
  2. Realbenzeyes @ Realbenzeyes: I always thought I should’ve been born in a much earlier time but I will say, i do enjoy my Xbox and occasional TV series tho 😂
  3. Realbenzeyes @ Realbenzeyes: I just wish the opioid epidemic never happened. Fk the turn of the century (which would be cool no doubt)! Many of my friends and family would’ve ended up in asylums like so many others. I just wish I could get back all those I’ve lost since the start
  4. L @ Layne_Cobain: 1914 I meant
  5. L @ Layne_Cobain: I often wish I lived during the turn of the century or at least before the Harrison narcotics act or whatever I think it was 1924 the fun ended but anyway yeh being able to get laudanum, ❄️ and amphetamine at the local friendly pharmacy
  6. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: Chew on the leaves with a bit of slaked lime and enjoy the mild boost you get from the raw base.
  7. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I’m sure you know the folks in the mountainous regions along South Americas pacific side buy cócà leaves at the local farmers market just to help acclimate to the higher elevation when they have to head up into the hills.
  8. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I would certainly have bought it, swilled it, enjoyed it…. Why not? A little boost in your juice isn’t going to hurt anyone.
  9. R @ Royboy99: Exports were reported to have around 7.2mg per FL OZ, it’s success is what actually led to Coca Cola
  10. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: Having cramps and husband thinks you’re acting hysterical (ie. PMS) the doc would either perform a certain massage to relieve the strains of motherhood and family life of that time or send you down to the local apothecary for a bottle of laudanum… A tincture of alcohol and 10% òpìųm. Fun days huh?
  11. R @ Royboy99: @malestrom: yeah thats it, my bad Mariani, yeah i considered that and also its ROA, which was oral so the bioavailability was lower than insufflation, higher degree of purity tho and longer duration … there was a significant marked increase of patents filed by Edison during the time it was released in the US. Presidents were known to use it as well, and the Queen. The pope awarded the wine the Vatican gold medal award
  12. Maelstrom @ Maelstrom: I think it was called vin Mariani. But yeah, it was all the rave back in the turn to the 20th century. Original formula Coca Cola did it for a while too. I think it was pretty weak though. Something like 200 mg per liter of wine. Enough to maybe give you a little push but unless you could pound some serious alcohol, it’d be hard to really feel the effects before the ethyl knocked you down on the ground. It was an interesting time period. Laudanum was a “hysterical” woman’s best friend.
  13. R @ Royboy99: Maybe it’s the admixture of my South American dna that works so well with it ? 🤷
  14. R @ Royboy99: It’s all evident in memory recall, my emails, meetings, … people invest everything they have in a nootropic that provides this… desperately searching without success and it’s right there right under their nose (no pun) … stigmatized by society and outlawed.
  15. R @ Royboy99: Now I’m not foolish or delusional to think that it made Edison who he was … it just allowed him to Edison to Edison to a greater degree … and I see it doing that for me and others who use it as a productive tool and not a substance of abuse.. you can look at this data with the level of patents filed by Edison during that time … comparable to Barry bonds or McGuire breaking records while they were subtly enhanced
  16. R @ Royboy99: One could argue that we would not have motion pictures if it wasn’t for ❄️
  17. R @ Royboy99: I also take month long breaks and replace with Ritalin for receptor recovery
  18. R @ Royboy99: And while it may sound insane and completely destructive … small microdoses of ❄️ has really transformed me. I did extensive research on its use by Edison, the pope at the time, and many others who got great benefit from a wine concoction called vin Mariani … this subtle enhancement changed the world and as long its used with a high degree of control, it’s amazing. you may think I’m crazy … but I’m just being as transparent as I can
  19. R @ Royboy99: I’ve grown to realize that my time is finite and Im only getting older… I’m back to relying on small PRN doses of FDA trialed BZDs and it’s made tremendous improvements to my quality of life. I just need to get out there more and meet someone new, it’s the only piece that’s missing since I’ve managed to get it together
  20. R @ Royboy99: @LatsDoodis: thanks brother … I’ve spent months trying to put myself in uncomfortable places to grow stronger. Hours of research, thousands on supplements, therapy etc …
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