Convincing a doc to script benzos?

[thatguy69]

Hey all,

I know that if you went and read my post history, you'd see that I fuck with all sorts of RC dissociatives and shit. However, I avidly assert that these are misguided attempts at self-medication because I feel like something is wrong all the time, cannot sit still, cannot sleep, and have extreme fear of failure (especially when it pertains to something simple as asking for someone for something to which they can say "no.")

I self-medicated with research benzos for years, and tbh those were the most comfortable years of my life. I wouldn't even call them a "good high," they just... make the bad feeling go away. I successfully Ashton Manual tapered myself off of the daily benzos without any medical supervision or even another individual holding me accountable; I do not have fundamental self control issues. My entire issue was that my problem was completely managed until I started to have to submit pre-employment drug tests after college, and would pop positive for benzos I didn't have a script for. I took it upon myself to manage my condition, and society basically told me "No. Not that way! We can't make any money off of you that way."

How is someone who has a "history of substance abuse" (not documented anywhere, I'd have to volunteer that info) supposed to convince a doc to write them a benzo script? I could lie (and I have no problem doing so), but I've essentially spent my entire life avoiding the American medical system because I believe it is corrupt to the core; I don't know what lie to tell.

Sourcing the benzos isn't even the issue. I have plenty. I just need for the benzo metabolites in my urine to be considered "government sanctioned." For both familial reasons (my family refuses to acknowledge that I have an actual problem unless I go get a diagnosis of some sort from a doctor), and because I will probably eventually be in another position to be drug tested for a job.

Anybody have any input, here?

 

[Jai239]

Just tell your PCP that you’re going on a flight and need a few- ask for minimum

 

[Gulp2788]

I think Jai has it right in the short term, I know these are researched mainly to provide relief against Anxiety and panic attacks, as far as long term help goes, I would encourage you to get off those zines and seek metaphysical help but that work is on you. Philosophy will free you and alternative health paths are available. You require help from the giants of psychology, Jung and Freud though at odds with each other will heal your soul sickness as if you were given succor from the staff of a witchdoctor. Inner peace is what you appear to seek, and Ch3m5 might help in the short term but you my friend are about to enter a journey for the sake of yourself. I would encourage you to take a drastic career shift if it is within the scope of your life's meaning. If you were thinking of taking on a lifestyle that intimidated you or felt out of your range of possibility until now, I would say now is the time to seize that moment.

 

[thatguy69]

I think Jai has it right in the short term, I know these are researched mainly to provide relief against Anxiety and panic attacks, as far as long term help goes, I would encourage you to get off those zines and seek metaphysical help but that work is on you. Philosophy will free you and alternative health paths are available. You require help from the giants of psychology, Jung and Freud though at odds with each other will heal your soul sickness as if you were given succor from the staff of a witchdoctor. Inner peace is what you appear to seek, and Ch3m5 might help in the short term but you my friend are about to enter a journey for the sake of yourself. I would encourage you to take a drastic career shift if it is within the scope of your life's meaning. If you were thinking of taking on a lifestyle that intimidated you or felt out of your range of possibility until now, I would say now is the time to seize that moment.

No. I need none of those things. I need a script for some benzos (It doesn't even matter which ones - I don't want to get high on them), and I will be a perfectly normal human being. I kicked the habit, lived my life clean for years, and all my problems just got worse. Might as just have the habit back; at least then I was comfortable.

I have a job, a house, pets, and a community that respects me. I'm not at rock bottom nor anywhere near it, and any and all recreational drug abuse stems from this desire to rid myself of the feeling of general malaise. My issue is that my dogmatic family and dogmatic society in general feel personally slighted by the fact that my "medication" doesn't come from a pharmacy where I've paid all sorts of taxes and fees just to get the same shitty quality control that I'd have gotten on the internet anyway.

I don't have a drug problem, nor any soul-sickness. Don't need to do any soul searching, and have already found inner peace. I am very happy with myself and where I am at in life. I have external turmoil; there are other individuals in my life that have taken it upon themselves to try to inject themselves in my choices. That is my entire issue.

I will not be going on any sort of journey of self-discovery. I've already done that. I spent years "finding myself" during college. I know myself, and I know what I need. You don't know me, and you are projecting either stereotypes or your own experience. Either way, cut it out. It is not useful in the slightest, and Freud can go fuck himself (I'm sure he'd like that too - the sick fuck).

Are you honestly recommending that I, a perfectly normal member society save for a bit of anxiety, take advice from a known sexual deviant? Why? Why would you EVER think that's good advice?

Listen to yourself. Listen to how ridiculous you sound. Why spell "chems" like Ch3m5? You think that helps hide DRUGBUYERSGUIDE from the internet crawlers? Also, no drug I've ever taken ends with "-zine."

You know nothing about the world. So, stop giving advice. I've been thinking about this problem for 15+ years and actively trying to solve it, you thought for 5 minutes, posted some BS about Jung and Freud, and called it day.

 

[Gulp2788]

An incredibly nasty reply however I suppose unsolicited advice begets unsolicited replies so I guess I deserved that. I apologize for offending you, it was not my intent. I hope you find the solutions to your problems on your own. I don't know how much of Freud you have read but the character of the philosopher doesn't speak to the quality of the philosophy, Plato was... disgusting to say the least and yet I would still think of his philosophy as good. That's all I will say further, I hope you are well good luck with your script.

 

[thatguy69]

An incredibly nasty reply however I suppose unsolicited advice begets unsolicited replies so I guess I deserved that. I apologize for offending you, it was not my intent. I hope you find the solutions to your problems on your own. I don't know how much of Freud you have read but the character of the philosopher doesn't speak to the quality of the philosophy, Plato was... disgusting to say the least and yet I would still think of his philosophy as good. That's all I will say further, I hope you are well good luck with your script.

I'm actually extremely sorry, and by the time I went and thought to delete it, I couldn't anymore. I really REALLY apologize.

Actually, I spoke to a psychiatrist today about this and I honestly told him "I'm usually the most kind and patient person, but I can get myself into a mode where I'm snappy and argumentative" and the worst part about me is that I'm extremely articulate, so when I decide to be mean, it can really hurt. I was in that mode today, and you happened to be the unlucky one to bare the brunt of it.

After listening to all of my problems, he did his best to recommend a first-line treatment: pramipexole (Mirapex) for RLS. I'm super happy that he is trying (and I told him "let me do some research on it, and I'll let you know!"), but there's no way in hell that I'm taking something that can cause liver failure and muscle wasting. Not when the literal extent of benzodiazepine/z-drug side effects are: memory problems, loss of coordination, sleepiness, and dependence.

Why in the world would anyone take any of those other drugs? They have side effect lists that are longer than most of our most dangerous "recreational drugs." And it's not like the doc could use "dependence" as an argument; Mirapex literally says 'Do not stop taking abruptly. May induce withdrawals.'

 

[Gulp2788]

NBD as I said it was unsolicited advice and you're right I was presuming too much about you, a stranger. Appreciate the apology and please accept mine in return. Yeah I get you about the side effects of the first suggestion. My doc wanted to prescribe me SSRI's for ADHD which I stalwartly refused as the last thing I want to be is forced to take something that we don't really understand how it works, works in a way that might be worse than the symptoms, and requires tapering if stopped due to the dependency it creates, not to mention the other side effects that often turn up. When we have something like amphs which have virtually none of the issues and all of the cure.

It is a problem in modern medicine, often doctors are scared to prescribe anything the agencies are claiming can be abused and are pushed by the companies that own them to use ones are more acceptable. This can cause serious harm imo but it is what it is. Maybe someday doctors will be able to use the proper protocols to cure problems again, it wasn't that long ago that they used to be able to do that. Gotta love corporate greed and government overreach.

 

[thatguy69]

Yup yup. But amphetamines are scary because they might actually make you feel good, without needing to circle back to the medical system to manage your ever-growing list of side effects.