Marriage is not what I'd hoped

I impulsively got married a couple years ago and I'm miserable. I was sober at the time and then I relapsed, and now I seem to relapse every few months. Drugs seem to be the only escape. The problem is for some reason my wife likes me way more than I like her. I'm too chicken to divorce her, but being married I keep building up pressure until I go back to drugs because I'm so unhappy. Sorry for bitching I don't know what to do.

 
I know this is an old post but I must say when I see a wedding being set up, or a girl shopping for a wedding dress I can't help but say under my breath...... Don't do it!!!!

 
I’ve been married twice and I’ll never do it again. First was an abusive (emotional and mental...physical abuse was on the horizon) asshole, second was a narcissistic asshole (this dude literally had every single trait of a narcissist). 

Whenever people tell me they’re getting married, I immediately say “Make sure you really know who you’re marrying. Take the ‘rose-colored’ glasses off and see their true self. 

And yes, I’m bitter as hell! But so would you if you were married to these guys. Esp the 2nd ex-hubby. I just have zero faith in marriage. Both ex’s changed for the worse after marrying them. But there were warning signs before each marriage...I just chose to ignore them and leave those shit rose glasses on. Lol. But...those glasses got torched and will never be used again. 

I look at it this way: I have enough of my own problems & issues to deal with/worry about...I sure as hell don’t need anybody else’s.  

 
Under the law, marriage is a legal contract, at least in the U.S.   I don't want to be in a monetary legal contract ever again.  Look at what happens on here, even the vendors that you don't even know screw you over and I bet the women to men ratio for that is much higher. I"ve also been married twice and both were shit, but when my second husband died 3 years ago, realized how much I loved him.  He was verbally abusive and treated me like shit, but it's even worse having no one to help, no one to say good night to, no one to vacation with, someone to at least help minimally with the kids, especially someone to discuss your day with.  I also would never get married again, but a non-monetary companion would be nice.  I am only in mid-50s, I look passable, but in my heart of hearts, I know there will never be another man interested in me and I will have to live alone trying to fix lawnmowers and move furniture by myself till I die with no family or friends to help.  COVID sure hasn't helped at all.  More loneliness.   I swear I love my dog more than anyone I know.

 
Drugbuyersguide Shoutbox
  1. Tucker @ Tucker: @Layne_Cobain , web
  2. L @ Layne_Cobain: Just noticed the avatar @Tucker …sorry about Mitch from one long suffering fan (rangers) to another 🫡
  3. Tucker @ Tucker: @dspring01 , I have no idea how messages work on here but dspring01 , turn your settings on so you can receive direct messages instead of on here or threads.
  4. Tucker @ Tucker: @dspring01 , I found out why I coulda’t send you a instant message. I believe you have yours turned off so that’s why. 👍👍
  5. G @ GrapePiss: longflourish
  6. H @ hotdog45: @CalFresh happy you're back my friend. Sent you an email
  7. CalFresh @ CalFresh: Hey all, I'm back up and running in a limited capacity for now. Hopefully full speed by the end of the week. Thanks to all for the overwhelming support. it feels so great to be part of a supportive community. Love you guys!
  8. Dr-Octagon @ Dr-Octagon: Dammit man
  9. M @ Mammasboi123: @Stevienixonn shout box is for non-vendor related convos IIRC. There’s a section of the forum for suggesting kratom vendors specifically. Check it out! Some great options in there.
  10. L @ Layne_Cobain: @Stevienixon cnc I believe
  11. Tucker @ Tucker: Sorry @ dspring01, I just read your message wrong. No worries. 👍. Tried sending you a direct message but wouldn’t allow me. Maybe im at my limit, not sure. Good luck bud.
  12. D @ dspring01: @Tucker - I am sorry. What was your question?
  13. Stevienixon @ Stevienixon: Trying to find 7oh
  14. Tucker @ Tucker: Hey @dspring01 what’s up with the sad looking face when asked where shipped too? Just asking
  15. F @ fyjclol: Scroll back & read it. Or read what he said on his thread.
  16. Saturnmeds @ Saturnmeds: What happened to calfresh? Someone stole his crypto?
  17. B @ bigblueallda: That sucks @CalFresh do you think it was an inside job? Or someone that knew.
  18. crimp @ crimp: do you live in a dangerous area maybe try moving to the country when you get back on your feet you seem to understant crypto beter then me so youll be on your feet in no time
  19. crimp @ crimp: do you live in a dangerous area maybe try moving to the country when you get back on your feet you seem to understant crypto beter then me so youll be on your feet in no time
  20. crimp @ crimp: glad youre good buddy
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