Marriage is not what I'd hoped

I impulsively got married a couple years ago and I'm miserable. I was sober at the time and then I relapsed, and now I seem to relapse every few months. Drugs seem to be the only escape. The problem is for some reason my wife likes me way more than I like her. I'm too chicken to divorce her, but being married I keep building up pressure until I go back to drugs because I'm so unhappy. Sorry for bitching I don't know what to do.

 
I know this is an old post but I must say when I see a wedding being set up, or a girl shopping for a wedding dress I can't help but say under my breath...... Don't do it!!!!

 
I’ve been married twice and I’ll never do it again. First was an abusive (emotional and mental...physical abuse was on the horizon) asshole, second was a narcissistic asshole (this dude literally had every single trait of a narcissist). 

Whenever people tell me they’re getting married, I immediately say “Make sure you really know who you’re marrying. Take the ‘rose-colored’ glasses off and see their true self. 

And yes, I’m bitter as hell! But so would you if you were married to these guys. Esp the 2nd ex-hubby. I just have zero faith in marriage. Both ex’s changed for the worse after marrying them. But there were warning signs before each marriage...I just chose to ignore them and leave those shit rose glasses on. Lol. But...those glasses got torched and will never be used again. 

I look at it this way: I have enough of my own problems & issues to deal with/worry about...I sure as hell don’t need anybody else’s.  

 
Under the law, marriage is a legal contract, at least in the U.S.   I don't want to be in a monetary legal contract ever again.  Look at what happens on here, even the vendors that you don't even know screw you over and I bet the women to men ratio for that is much higher. I"ve also been married twice and both were shit, but when my second husband died 3 years ago, realized how much I loved him.  He was verbally abusive and treated me like shit, but it's even worse having no one to help, no one to say good night to, no one to vacation with, someone to at least help minimally with the kids, especially someone to discuss your day with.  I also would never get married again, but a non-monetary companion would be nice.  I am only in mid-50s, I look passable, but in my heart of hearts, I know there will never be another man interested in me and I will have to live alone trying to fix lawnmowers and move furniture by myself till I die with no family or friends to help.  COVID sure hasn't helped at all.  More loneliness.   I swear I love my dog more than anyone I know.

 
Drugbuyersguide Shoutbox
  1. S @ sporidicus: delete this though, if it's the wrong place
  2. S @ sporidicus: sorry I don't think I know what this is for. but It's the #4 edition
  3. kemdawg99 @ kemdawg99: @sporidicus reddit maybe? What mag?
  4. kemdawg99 @ kemdawg99: Anyone heard of ethyl midazolam, cyclopropyl midazolam or ethyl flualprazolam?
  5. D @ dhertz9192@gm: Delete
  6. Thoth @ Thoth: @sporidicus honestly depends on the mag. Read read read read the forum
  7. Thoth @ Thoth: CFP needs more of an NBA or MLB playoff structure but that would be hard to structure. Divisions inside Leagues
  8. S @ sporidicus: or is there a better place on the forum to ask
  9. S @ sporidicus: can anyone help me with a chemistry problem? someone purposefully poured powdered sugar into my mag, i need to see if i can clean it off. any chemists here?
  10. M @ meepmoopmeep: agreed
  11. D @ drdrizzy13: Yea it will be tough but I think they might just have enough. I guess we will see what tomorrrow night?
  12. M @ meepmoopmeep: if miami can take down ohio then anything can happen, lmao
  13. M @ meepmoopmeep: i feel like they deserve it after all of the drama. at the same time though, Indiana is extremely good and will be a mountain for Ole Miss to climb if they make it to the championship game
  14. D @ drdrizzy13: I wouldn't mind seeing Ole Miss win either out of the teams that are left.
  15. M @ meepmoopmeep: Ole Miss has the chance to do the funniest thing ever and win a championship without Kiffin
  16. M @ meepmoopmeep: I have a vendetta against Miami so I’m hoping its Indiana v Ole Miss
  17. M @ meepmoopmeep: Who’s making it to the CFP championship?
  18. R @ Royboy99: Helllsss yeah Boys JAX review in
  19. L @ Layne_Cobain: @tiquanunderwood sorry brother that’s a tough pill to swallow fuck
  20. Y @ Yaugae5121: I cannot believe that ending. That game was absolutely INSANE!!
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